I t didn’t happen. You wanted it to happen, but somehow, over time, the change just didn’t last.
We can all say this about ourselves in some areas of our life. Maybe it is the new skills you wanted to learn to change your career. Maybe you were given constructive feedback earlier in your career, and you agreed with that feedback, but then did not change much as time went on. Unfortunately, the same weaknesses and deficiencies really hurt your career when you competed for senior roles years later.
Significant development is hard. This truth in life affects us all. Growth, change, personal improvement, becoming highly skilled, etc. comes with challenges and barriers. A hundred things can be said about why development is hard but I’m going to focus on a few obstacles that, from my experience in the business world, seem to make the biggest difference.
The first development obstacle is yourself. Your thoughts and emotions can create a minefield of doubt and discouragement, which block you from making the sustained effort to develop. Here are some common mental and emotional barriers to our development.
Choice. Someone is pushing you to develop yourself, but you don’t want to. Maybe it’s the boss who expects more. Maybe you’ve been given some feedback or people are telling you that you really should learn how to do something. When the idea to develop is not your own, or if you outright disagree with what others think you need to develop, then you will not ‘own’ the idea and that will limit your desire to grow or change. I’ve seen many senior leaders dismiss feedback and useful advice because they liked who they were and did not see the need to change.
Self-concept. The self-concept is a relatively consistent set of beliefs you hold about yourself. It relates to your personal values, sense of identity, what you think your talents are, and basically the type of person you think you are. For instance, you are an operations leader and enjoy being close to the production in the manufacturing plant. Your self-concept is constructed around you being a hands-on, engaged leader who solves production problems and makes decisions. You enjoy being this person. Your company wants you to improve your financial acumen, look at operations strategy, and manage production planning. This type of role does not fit with how you perceive yourself. Thus, you will not want to make the sustained effort to develop the new skills. You value getting the work done in the field more than reporting it from the office.
Motivation. Some people in business just stop wanting to make the effort to develop. Sometimes other things that demand your commitment are more important and you don’t have the energy, desire, time or interest to focus on your development and growth. Maybe the original purpose is no longer important.
Comfort Zone. Comfort zones are routines that are predictable with likely success and in which we feel we have some control over the outcome. We all enjoy our comfort zones because they come with less stress and anxiety, and we can relax and enjoy the experience. However, remaining in our comfort zone hurts our development since we are not pushed to do anything different or learn new ways to get things done. Michael Lombardo and Robert Eichinger explain it well in their book The Leadership Machine: “Development is a demand pull. If the experience demands that we learn to do something new or different, or we fear we will fail, then we are uncomfortable. Development is discomfort, because comfort is the enemy of growth. Staying in our comfort zone or building our nest encourages repetition. Going against the grain, being forced or venturing outside the cosy boxes of our lives demands that we learn.”
Past Failures. We’ve all experienced failures. It’s part of being human and choosing to try to accomplish something. The problem is that sometimes failures are accompanied by extreme criticism, a deep sense of regret and doubt, and perhaps the failure came with severe consequences such as a job loss and public shame. People naturally do not want to return to situations that hurt them. Yet, past failures can hold people back from growing into new people due to a lack of confidence, self-doubt, and the strong desire to avoid anything associated with that catastrophic failure. In my experience, relationships are the most damaging type of failure that hurts careers. Many highly skilled, smart and capable people limit themselves because of how people have hurt them in the past and damaged their ability to trust others, lead others, and build healthy new relationships.
The next main category of why development is so hard is what I call the practical side of development. Sometimes people are in mentally and emotionally states ready to develop, but they just don’t apply some practical methods to get it done over time. These are a few practices that help make significant development easier.
The Why. Significant growth and development require time, effort and practice to really change. Along the way, it is easy to give up or forget why the development is important to you. Research shows that attaining long-term, challenging goals requires people to toggle between two modes – purpose and execution. The purpose is remembering the ‘why’ you are developing and the execution of a plan that is carried out. Most of the time should be spent focusing on doing the actions that create the development, but on occasions, especially when frustrated or tired, it is important to pause and consider why you are on the development journey, the benefits you expect, and the satisfaction you will have when it’s done.
Focus. A lack of focus is probably the most common reason people do not learn as much as they could. Our society today is replete with opportunities to disengage from what is happening around us and escape into the world of our smartphones. We now can create our ‘own world of interests’ through apps, social media and communication, and not notice what is happening around us. If you ask veteran teachers what is most different about students today than 30 years ago, many will tell you about more distraction from smartphones, shorter attention spans, and less interest in reading books.
The trend of not focusing on your current environment combined with a growing lack of focus and shorter attention spans significantly impacts development. Famed neuroscientist, Daniel Willingham, emphasises the connection between learning and thinking and states that ‘memory is the residue of thought’. For people to take in new knowledge and retain it, they need to engage their brains and think about the information being presented. People engage their thinking more when they must solve moderately to challenging problems, are interested in the topic, and have a variety of learning methods, including the opportunity to practice. For guidance in a classroom, Willingham promotes a 30/70 rule that says 30% of the time should be spent learning new information and 70% of the time should be given to discussing, practicing and applying the new information.
Feedback. Good, constructive, specific feedback is lacking in the business world. Many leaders do not dedicate enough time or give enough effort to really give their people enough feedback. Perhaps the leaders expect the feedback to evolve into a debate with the employee or become a difficult conversation that hurts feelings. However, the harsh reality is that people need feedback in order to improve.
The easiest way to people to receive feedback is contrast. Simply allow people to spend time with others who are better, more effective, and more skilled than they are. Let them experience and observe how others get the job done. Contrast is a great teacher. We learn quickly by comparisons as we observe others and see different styles and techniques that contrast to our own approaches.
The harder but most effective way for people to receive feedback is by not just making them aware of their development needs but to work with them directly in their development journey. When a leader also becomes a role model, coach or expert then people have the encouragement and accountability to develop. The legendary swimming coach at Stanford University, Richard Quick, who has coached seven people who achieved Olympic gold medals once said, “When you continue to try to improve, to be willing to change your technique and develop new strategies, you have a chance for greatness.”
Development is a journey, and we all have our challenges that make the journey difficult at times. If we can overcome the obstacles along the way, then it will be worth it.
